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As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
Related topics: Cute Whimsey Cynical
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
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Thank You,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
If a man does not make new acquaintances
as he advances through life,
he will soon find himself alone.
A man, sir, should keep his friendships in constant repair.
- Samuel Johnson
As soon as there is life there is danger.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am but a grain of sand on the beach of life.
My footprints in the sands of time soon wash away.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You cannot do a kindness too soon,
for you never know how soon it will be too late.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I never think of the future - it comes soon enough.
- Albert Einstein
The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon,
but that we wait so long to begin it.
- Anonymous
Act the way you'd like to be
and soon you'll be the way you act.
- Leonard Cohen
There is a fine line between perseverance and insanity.
At what point have you tried your best,
and it's time to do something different?
It's a balance - a paradox.
If you get in the habit of giving up
as soon as something gets difficult,
your life won't work,
but if you keep tilting at windmills -
madly trying the same thing again and again,
your life also won't work.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
As soon as you trust yourself,
you will know how to live.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Knowledge is soon changed, then lost in the mist, an echo half-heard.
- Gene Wolfe
When people get married because they think
it's a long-time love affair,
they'll be divorced very soon,
because all love affairs end in disappointment.
But marriage is a recognition of a spiritual identity.
- Joseph Campbell
As soon as man does not take his existence for granted,
but beholds it as something
unfathomably mysterious, thought begins.
- Albert Schweitzer
A fool and his money are soon elected.
- Will Rogers
We should meet abuse by forbearance.
Human nature is so constituted that
if we take absolutely no notice of anger or abuse,
the person indulging in it will soon weary of it and stop.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
A truly good book teaches me better than to read it.
I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint.
What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.
- Henry David Thoreau
If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but think you can't
It's almost a cinch you won't.
Life's battles don't always go to the stronger or faster man;
But soon or late the man who wins is the one who thinks he can.
- Anonymous
Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer
Finish each day and be done with it.
You have done what you could;
some blunders and absurdities have crept in;
forget them as soon as you can.
Tomorrow is a new day;
you shall begin it serenely
and with too high a spirit
to be encumbered with your old nonsense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Truth is by nature self-evident.
As soon as you remove the cobwebs of ignorance
that surround it, it shines clear.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
A people that values its privileges
above its principles
soon loses both.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
There never was and is not likely soon to be
a nation of philosophers,
nor am I certain it is desirable that there should be.
- Henry David Thoreau
On His Blindness:
When I consider how my light is spent
Ere half my days in this dark world and wide,
And that one Talent which is death to hide
Lodged with me useless, though my soul more bent
To serve therewith my Maker, and present
My true account, lest He returning chide,
"Doth God exact day-labour, light denied?"
I fondly ask. But Patience, to prevent
That murmur, soon replies, "God doth not need
Either man's work or his own gifts. Who best
Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state
Is kingly: thousands at his bidding speed,
And post o'er land and ocean without rest;
They also serve who only stand and wait.
- John Milton (1608-1674)
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo,
but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you
when the limo breaks down.
- Oprah Winfrey
A friend is someone who understands my past,
believes in my future,
and accepts me just the way I am.
- Anonymous
Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Can miles truly separate us from friends?
If we want to be with someone we love, aren't we already there?
- Richard Bach
What is a friend? I will tell you ...
it is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.
- Frank Crane
A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South
No matter what happens, someone will find a way
to take it too seriously.
- Dave Barry
Hell is living with someone who complains, whines, and argues.
- Anonymous
The most pathetic person in the world
is someone who has sight, but has no vision.
- Helen Keller
We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone -
but paradoxically, if we cannot trust,
neither can we find love or joy.
- Walter Anderson
When someone has a strong intuitive connection,
Buddhism suggests that it's because of karma,
some past connection.
- Richard Gere
The art of acceptance is the art of making someone
who has just done you a small favor
wish that he might have done you a greater one.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Resenting someone, or hating someone, ensures that
you can never emotionally escape that person.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When you see someone putting on his Big Boots,
you can be pretty sure that an Adventure is going to happen.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
To love someone deeply gives you strength.
Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.
- Lao Tzu
Before beginning a Hunt, it is wise to ask someone
what you are looking for before you begin looking for it.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand,
nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship;
it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one
when he discovers that someone else believes in him
and is willing to trust him with his friendship.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength;
loving someone deeply gives you courage.
- Lao Tzu
Every time you smile at someone,
it is an action of love,
a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.
- Mother Teresa
Resenting someone is a way of never leaving that person.
- Kare Anderson
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Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"The Philosopher of Happiness" - is the author of 100 Secrets for Living a Life You Love, co-author of Simply An Inspired Life, speaker, personal coach, and creator of the popular Daily Inspiration - Daily Quote free email.>
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